Hiatus No More

My almost five months hiatus in blogging had several shares of reasons behind. As much as I am tempted to scribble it here I’d rather keep mum of the reasons tailed on it.

Figuratively speaking, it’s like when God showered me with blessings, the devil worked double time to distract me forcing to experience with like a bunch of concerns.

I thought I was defiant but not.

Admittedly, one of the most vivid reasons is that “I simply lost my usual zest to write”. I’ve tried my hardest to write, to express, chronicle even the not so interesting part of it but I simply succumb to “mental block.

With that span of time of absence in the blogging world, I feel like I was lost in my comfort zone. I feel like forcing a come back is so hard for me. I just can’t express. I can’t expound. Every time I attempt to write I just find myself flabbergasted. Eventually, leading me to stop because ideas just don’t fluidly flow. Ideas seem so far away and uncooperative. Words don’t jive so easily like I’m about to stumble every time I write the wrong words to use, the proper adjectives to express.

Mind you guys, I even tried reading many of my entries just to trigger me again but I just ended up reading it and wondering. I kept on convincing myself by asking question like “Did I really wrote it? How come I had these beautiful words joined together, paragraph worthy of praise? (buhat ng little chair alert-haha) Why is it that now I can’t even expound? What’s happening to me?

With this event, I failed a lot with my promises for 2013 – failing to accomplish my 100 Inspiring People for 2013, completely failing to do the remaining bloggers I initially intended to feature. Even losing track of other “friend bloggers’ blogs to read and comment on.

I failed to deliver to put it graciously. It’s just a bunch of failure.

On a positive note, hiatus had made several productive impacts on me as well. To start with, I was able to completely bond with my little boy Damien Caleb – who’s now a one-year old hyperactive and a bit naughty toddler. His journey is quite public since my FB is updated and so those ‘blogger friends’ under my FB circle can attest to that. Adding to the list – I was able to devote much of my time monitoring my stock market exposure as a new entrant while studying and reading financial and market news that affects it. Reading a number of books also took part in my time. I’d make it a point that I read every night.

But like the famous cliché goes “Every beginning has its ending as every problem has its solution”. And every hiatus has to meet its end.

Perhaps I just failed to realize that I have dreams to work on. Like any other blogger who dream of one day “a book under my name will be published.”

For someone like me who was able to establish platform of friendship in the blogging world, I sure do miss my blogger friends. You know who you are I don’t need to mention-haha. I’m not so sure if all of them still miss me – haha! Perhaps they’re busy with their exciting lives now.

Everyone in the blogging world relatively aims to have a readership – people who religiously follow and read a blog. Initially, I’m among them. But one trusted blogger friend reminded me once again of why I blog. It should be an expression of myself and what I want to write without the need to be followed and read as blogging is “too personal”. It’ll like a bonus if the content will keep the reading public to frequent your blog site. Tama nga! Bakit ko nga ba medyo kinakalimutan ang basic truth about blogging na ito..tsk! tsk! Memory gap? Probably yes! Hahaha!

And so I’ll say this, I cannot promise if I can regularly visit all my blogger-friends’ site in the same manner that I won’t fret if they would fail to check out my blog too.

I have this to add too, I will still read any blog that interest me even if the owner/author does not follow/read mine.